1. All the firsts—smile, rollover, crawl, walk, word—seem over.
2. When the baby doesn’t need you to hold the bottle, thank you very much.
3. The first time someone asks you out for a play date.
4. Realizing you should buy a back up I-can’t-sleep-without-it lovey.
5. Making it through the first year.
6. Making it through your last first year.
7. Crying in front of a mom you hardly know.
8. Being done with baby gates and bed rails and less guilt over the baby-proofing you never did.
9. No more diaper bag.
10. Holding someone else’s baby when you no longer have one.
11. Ditching the stroller and then wishing you could move as fast as you did with the stroller.
12. Teaching them how to vacuum up their own cereal from the couch.
13. First babysitter leaves for college.
14. First repeated curse word.
15. Watching their face when they learn that not everyone in the world is good or nice or safe.
16. A teacher calls to tell you someone bit someone.
17. Forgetting one of those “wear this” days at school.
18. First “I hate you! You are the worst mom ever!”
19. First request for a play date with a kid you don’t like.
20. The first time your kids bond over being yelled at by their parents.
21. The ease of only a booster seat.
22. The first time you pay for a class they won’t attend.
23. You can’t remember the last time you wiped someone else’s bum.
24. Both kids have play dates and you don’t know what to do with yourself.
25. Catching your breath knowing there will be no more babies.
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